Sunday, 22 May 2011

22nd May 2011 - 21 weeks

So after the hardest week of my life so far I am left feeling exhausted and fearful of how much harder things will become. Dad seems to be going downhill rapidly, we leave him some days wondering if this will be his last. It's so surreal as only 10 days ago he was himself, and now he is a weak, fragile, confused man, losing his pride, dignity and love of life.

There's no hope of a cure, we don't even know yet whether they will give him chemo. I know it's so easy t knock the NHS even though there are so many dedicated staff, but the system is appalling, chaotic and slow. There's no time for caring, or making people comfortable, important things are lost and forgotten. Results take forever and people can be left in pain for hours unnoticed. Disgraceful. If it wasn't for my Mum and my sister seeing him twice a day then I can only imagine how much worse it would be for him.

Everything else in my life has been put on hold, but the little boy in my tummy continues to grow, oblivious (hopefully) of the turmoil. I am trying to be strong for him and keep eating and drinking enough. I've certainly been getting some good exercise this week, which is good for both of us. He's really grown this week too, and I actually feel like I have a proper bump - even if it is hidden in my podge still when I sit up.

I have another scan this Thursday to get a better view of things. God I hope everything is ok, I wouldn't be able to cope with anything else at the moment.

Here are my measurements for the week -

Bust - 52 inches (+0.5)
Waist - 50 inches (+0.5)
Hips - 56 inches (no change)
Weight - +0.6kg

  • constipation
  • back ache
  • aches very low down
  • leg cramps
And now for the weekly shots - 

21 weeks plan view

21 weeks side view

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